fear.
For too long . . .
. . . Fear kept me from getting my hopes up.
. . . Fear kept me from thinking maybe this time would be okay.
. . . Fear kept me from hoping for the best.
. . . Fear kept my hands tied from journalling or blogging, because putting words in print feels so permanent and leaves me vulnerable.
. . . Fear stopped me from writing because too much time had past.
And now I sit here, days away from the most amazing boy's very first birthday, who got here by way of an incredible adventure, and I missed out on the real-time chronicling of every step of that nerve-wracking journey.
Fear stops now.
Our boy's name means bold; whole-hearted; one who has fearlessness in the face of overwhelming odds. To teach my boy fearlessness I will not allow fear to rule my days.
He has already taught me so much about boldness, and I cannot ever see the world the same way that I did before I became his mom.
I am a Mom.
I will not be afraid. I have more important things to be.